2013

Happy New Year.....actually there's nothing to celebrate about this coming new year. All my past new year resolutions remain just that..new year resolution. I never get to accomplish them. So there is nothing special about this 2013.

But what a year 2012 was. In May I went to America, in June my son Nabil came home and I lost my dear Abah in October. It was such a profound loss for me and my family. You could say that I start my 2013 by becoming an orphan. I know at this age nobody will call me an orphan, but to put it blindly as my cousin did, she wants to be called an orphan no matter what age. Mind you, my cousin is 6 or 7 years older than me.

So this new year there will be no resolutions of any kind to me. I am only going to take care of my health, do a bit of exercise like brisk walking every now and then and totally cut carbonated drink from my diet. I think I can do this . If I can lose a kilo or two I will be over the moon.. If I don't, it's not the end of the world for me but the pain in my legs will not go away because my weight is just too much for them to bear. Talking about the end of the world on 21st Dec 2012, who in the right frame of mind would believe a human being for making such a prediction?. Only Allah knows not us the mortal beings.

Happy New Year everyone

Mysha's Fruit

I call this cantaloupe, Mysha's fruit. It was meant to distract her from crying. It was Monday morning and she suffered from Monday blues...I told her the fruit is hers and suddenly she stopped from crying. This is the only cantaloupe that I have from my one and only plant.

The fruit is growing nicely but the leaves are being eaten alive by bugs...And my husband wants to kill the bugs by spraying Sheltox. Of course I told him not to..konon konon nak organic fruit. I just don't know whether the fruit can ripen in time before its natural death.

Mysha is so proud of the fruit. Keep showing everybody the fruit. Lets just hope she wouldn't pluck it before time

Doa PAS

MasyaAllah, ....doa yang di pinta oleh PAS betul betul mengejutkan. Sebagai parti politik yang memperjuangkan agama Islam dan diterajui oleh alim ulama, doa tersebut pada saya adalah amat tidak wajar. Terlalu zalimkah kerajaan sekarang sehingga doa sedemikian di pinta?

Sepatutnya PAS memohon supaya semua pemimpin yang zalim diganti dengan pemimpin yang adil dan saksama....terdesak sangatkah mereka hendak Putrajaya sehingga sanggup memohon dari Allah sedemikian doa. Aapakah kezaliman yang dilakukan kepada Ustaz Hadi? Anak-anaknya kebulurankah? Keluarganya dibunuhkah? Mereka tidak dapat solatkah? Mereka tidak dapat mempraktikkan ugama Islamkah? Rumah mereka dibakarkah? Jika semua ini terjadi memang sewajarnya doa itu dipohon....tetapi tidakkan?

Didalam keluarga saya, ada yang berfahaman politik PAS, ada UMNO dan ada PKR
..
Tak sanggup saya memanjat doa sedemikian. Tak sampai hati saya walau di paksa  sekalipun. Tak tergamak mendoakan saudara saya hancur...sedih apabila pejuang Agama Islam tidak langsung mempunyai perasaan belas kesian kepada saudara sesama Islam. Orang Yahudi dan yang bukan beragama Islam ketawa dibelakang.....mission accomplished.

Kenapa tidak memohon kepada Allah supaya menang PRU 13sahaja? Saya selalu menasihati anak-anak saya jika ingin maju kedepan , tunjuk kebolehan kita, jangan sekalikali menjatuhkan orang lain. Tunjuk apa yang kita boleh buat , kebaikan-kebaikan kita, bukan dengan cara menunjuk kejahatan orang, kelemahan orang dan menghancurkan orang. .

Kadang -kadang Allah tidak perkenankan hajat kita memerintah negara mungkin ada sebabnya. Mungkin kita akan menjadi lebih zalim bila kuasa berada ditangan kita. Saya sangat takut , sangat sangat takut dengan perkembangan yang ada sekarang. Pada saya, dengan berdoa sedemikian rupa, para ulama PAS tidak ada perasaan belas kasihan langsung terhadap saudara sesama Islam. Apa akan terjadi sekiranya mereka mereka ini menjadi pemimpin negara?  Saya tidak teragak agak bahawa mereka akan menjadi pemimpin yang lebih kejam dari pemimpin pemimpin yang ada sekarang. Saya memohon kepada Allah supaya Malaysia dipelihara olehNya dari sebarang bencana . Amin

Nurul Izzah's Famous Statement

I watched the news and I am very afraid for Nurul Izzah. As a muslim, I tried to refrain myself talking about matters that I am not qualified in. So, I guess, Nurul Izzah should also do the same. I know for some of us who are liberals,her speech came across as refreshing.....but has she ever thought that due to her speech...those contemplating of being a murtad...decide to go ahead in the name of kebebasan berugama applies to them too.??. Na'uzubillah

What she says about the quality of muslim is true. It is good that the rukun islam is followed without fail..but there are moments in our lives that our faith are at its lowest point...then it goes up.....down and up...again and again. But Allah promise us Jannah as long as we never mensyirikkannya. Isn't that good enough for us muslim? What she should have said is ...be a muslim and find it in your hearts to be a good muslim, follow the Rukun Islam diligently.  Instead she said the quality is the most important ( which I do not dispute) ..as if the rest of the muslims are not good and can exercise their rights in kebebasan berugama...If I am interpreting her speech that way ..what about others..

That is why I am very afraid for Nurul Izzah

The Pomegranate Fruit

Finally, there are 5 fruits on my pomegranate tree. I'm so happy...I only expect one fruit this season and yet there are five of them. 2 are really big, 2 medium and 1 still very small. Hopefully we can eat a few pomegranate soon ( though I think it might not be too soon). Yeah!!!!

The Flowers

The flowers of my pomegranate tree are dropping. The tree bore more than twenty blooms, only a few started to fruit and they just dropped off like that. I've read a few comments , some says there's no pollination, some says too much fertilisers and some even said  there's evil eye effect from some bad people...ha ha ha.

Well, I guess they are like human too. Remember some of us who miscarried the first time we are pregnant? I hope my trees will try to be strong so that they can produce some fruits in the next season. I didn't expect too much from this season flowering but to have just one matured fruit would be really nice

In the meantime my calamansi plant is flushed with new leaves and refuse to flower. These plants are having a mind of their own. We just can't force them at all. No matter what fertisers you are giving them they will take their own sweet time to grow, to flower etc etc

Al Fatihah

How do you let go a man who accompany you
To the toilet in the middle of the night when you were to scared to go on your own ?
How do you let go of a man who wrote letters to you
Every single week for six years when you were in the boarding school?
How do you let go of a man who can't express himself in words
But his every action told you that he loves you unconditionally?
How do you let go of a man who has been your first love and has been always?
How do you let go of a man who has loved you for 56 years?
Tell me...how do you let go of him?

Al Fatihah

Rosmah Mansor

She is our Prime Minister's wife. A lot have been said about her...especially she being a shoppaholic and spendthrift. ' Boros' in our language. Pictures of her having this and that ....wearing this and that have been splashed all over the medias and the internet.

I've seen her photographs wearing expensive jewelries. But I have only this to say. Those jewelries might be fake costing much much much less than what they seemed to be. I've seen those jewelries sold for a fraction of the real thing in the internet. I remember a relative of mine said if you have a big car, whatever you wear people will think it's the real thing but if you have a small car, whatever real thing you wear people think it is fake.

So it will not surprised me what Rosmah is wearing are fakes. She has a lot of functions to attend and a lot of clothes to wear. I for one, would not want my Prime Minister's wife look 'selekeh' in any functions. For you out there, there are lots and lots of fake jewelry to be bought from the internet that look so real for a fraction of the price of the real thing. Buy them to your hearts content.

Just Say Good Things

Lately, I felt most people tend to talk bad about something, someone or whatever else that they don't like. My dear husband always says to me ...if you do not have anything nice to say don't say anything at all. I tried my very best to follow his advice though sometimes it was very hard. It is hard for him too. So we keep reminding each other on this.

Before I went for my Hajj, I prayed to Allah that I will only say good things..True enough .. I became a quiter person. By nature I'm a talkative person. There's a lot of things that were happening around me that I didn't quite like, but I can't seemed to talk bad about them. Praise to Allah that I became a better person during that time. I hope I will continue doing that. That's why I like Anas Zubedy call for all Malaysians to say good things even about your enemies.

But the general election is coming soon..I dare not think about the months, weeks before the election. I just hope those in the politics just say good things...the good things that they have done and the good things that they are going to do.. Please, please refrain from saying the bad things ...from the bad policies, character assasination or the like. I got tired reading about them either in the newspapers or the internet.

With that said, I hope everyone of us will try to be a better person. I know sometimes we want to express ourselves and some things need to be be said. Just say it in a general way. I know its easy to say than done...

The Gardener in Me

My pomegranate trees have grown really tall, almost seven feet tall. It's too early for them to bear fruits just yet. Just a few weeks ago, one of the trees bore a flower. Yes, only one flower and I got so excited over that one flower. However, it just dropped dead just like that. My nona plant is doing well too. So are my avocadoes, lemon, mulberry, papaya, calamansi and kaffir limes. Most of the plants I've already transplanted in the large rubbish bins. Some in the plastic pails that I've got very cheap from the Tesco sales.

The funny thing is that I cannot say the same about my vegetables. My zuchinni really grew very well and suddenly one of the plants succumbed to the soft rot. I don't think it's a common disease to zuchinni. The other two plants are well and only producing male flowers so there goes the fruits since my plants are barren. The last zuchinni is like 'hidup segan mati tak mahu'. My cantaloupe also suffer from the same fate of hidup segan mati tak mahu.

I guess I am more of the fruit tree person rather than the vegetable person. But I am not giving up hope despite with no encouragement from my family. I am determined to make my fruit trees and vegetables grow so that I can taste the fruit of my so called hard labour. One other thing, the other day, the garbage truck pick up all my compost that I've been saving for my plants. Serves me right for making the rubbish bin as a compost bin....even the garbage man isn't supportive of my gardening!!!!.

Do Not Do Unto Others.........

Do you remember when you were little and used to fight among your friends? One of the most hurtful things you might said was 'kepala bapak kau'. The head is one of the most revered things. It holds the crown of your being. To say 'kepala bapak kau' and stepped on it is the most disgraceful act any person can do. But children being children they outgrew it. Parents will reprimand them when they said such things. Good parents, I mean. What about those children whose parents adhere to whatever they were doing? . These children grew up and become the ones who show  their butts to the pictures of our Prime Minister and his wife and stepped on them too.

Would you be angry when others do that to the pictures of your parents? . I bet 100 percent that you are willing to lift up your arms and fight for the sanctity of your parents.

Those people are kurang ajar because their parents never teach them. Oh! ..your parents did teach you to behave....Then why are you doing unto others what you don't want others do unto you? Kenapa tak ada adab ? And you said jangan sebut pasal bapak tak ajar? Isn't Najib a parent to his children? How would his children feel? Yes, you don't care...

If I were your parent, I'd be ASHAMED having you as my son. Period.

Jalur Gemilang

The thing about Malaysian politics is that they politicised almost everthing and almost everyday.  There are a few things that should not be politicised at all. One is our national flag..the Jalur Gemilang.

The Jalur Gemilang is the very entity of Malaysia. The whole world knows Malaysia through the Jalur Gemilang. During the olympics, commonwealth games, meetings even those rows of flags at the United Nation building, the Jalur Gemilang stands tall with other nations' flags.

The Jalur Gemilang should be protected at all costs. During wars of olden days, the flag bearer is the most inportant person. If he drops the flag, it was as if the country has lost a war. It has become the symbol of a nation. It cannot be compromised even if you don't like it.

The Malaysian youths who came up with a new flag were not even born when the nation has the Jalur Gemilang.  They never fought for the independence. They never shed blood for their country against communism. What right do they have to change the Malaysian flag? Hadn't their parents taught them anything than being kurang ajar? We got our independence without a drop of blood and now we want to let go of it with bloodshed? That doesn't make sense.

I have this one thing to say to those Malaysians...read the Islamic history of a person who carried the Islamic flag during the Holy wars. When his right hand was cut off - he held the flag with his left hand. When the left hand was cut off - he held the flag with his mouth....until someone else took over the flag from him. Would any of you still carry the 'new flag' when the police fires tear gases at you?
Definitely a big NO...

The Trip To NYC

I was away in May for 20 days. It was a trip that I planned quite some times ago. My son, Nabil has finally graduated from university. I made it sound like he never left the university for a long time. Well actually he graduated on time...thank goodness. But the trip to New York was something else. Together with my daughter and her daughter, we left Klia at 3.30 in the morning. What a time to travel with a 14 months old baby. I was lucky in the sense that my granddaughter only wants to hang on to her mother. The transit in Doha took 2 hours...just nice for us to catch the next plane to Nyc. The journey back took 19 hours .Nadia was like a zombie due to lack of sleep eventhough Mysha slept almost all the way from NYC to Doha. The 50 minutes transit in Doha is only for seasoned travelers who know their way around the airport.You need at least 2 hours to go through the customs and all before boarding the next plane. Anyway, I enjoyed my trip very much. I got to see the Niagara Falls and some very fine paintings.And of course I attended Nabil's graduation.

Bersih

I was on the way to Subang Bestari when I was trapped in a traffic jam. It was 10 o'clock in the morning when suddenly my husband mentioned Bersih to me. The first time we were more or less indirectly involved with Bersih. We had to call Ah Lek that we will be late for the appointment.

A day after.. there's nothing bersih about Bersih. There were rubbish all over the place. I'm not going to talk about what had actually happened that day. But I firmly believe that DBKL should impose some sort of deposit to any organizers who want to hold street protest or whatever. The deposit should be high enough to cover the cost of removing rubbish, to replace any damage to property and most of all to pay the policemen for working overtime.

Then perhaps..perhaps the organizers will think 1000xs whether to hold their protest in the streets. Let them pay the rent for any premises they wish to hold their rallies. If they can pay for banners, t-shirts etc., they should pay for the aftermath of the events.Show the masses that they are sincere and they can control the crowd. To ask petty traders to go to the court to ask compensations from them shows that they don't care. Pandai suruh orang obey and follow procedures of the court ..when you as the official of the court refused to obey the court order. Ambiga..I'm getting angry here. Why you let this happen again and again to the normal people who are trying to make a living. Put yourself in their shoes and I am very sure you will feel the pain of these people.

There's nothing bersih about your bersih. Imagine the hawkers have to fork out money to hire lawyers for their cases. You are talking through your ***. I am not going to apologise to you about your involvement in making my country huru hara. That's how I feel..I am just a housewife but millions of housewives out there surely feel the same way I do.

I just don't know why I can't even look at your picture..It makes my blood boils literally which is very unhealthy  for me. Whaat do you really want? The SPRM has done whatever need to be done..why aren't you feel satisfied? Will there be a Bersih 4.0? Do have it because only a bunch of dungus like you will attend it

The Election

How do you feel when someone said that you are 'answerable' in the hereafter if you vote for a 'wrong' person in the coming election?..Well, I got scared for a while..then I think again..how do I know if the person I voted for is the 'wrong' one? How do I choose the right person? Is there a 'right' person to begin with?

So I decided to base my choice on track records..that's all that I have. I weigh the pros and cons of the situation. With gutter politics happening everywhere, whom do I trust to lead the country? One party says this and another party says that. They are very good at confusing the rakyats.

That reminds me of Israq and Mikraj..where Gabriel asked The Prophet saw, not to turn his face to a group of people when they called out to him. When The Prophet saw asked Gabriel who are these people..Gabriel said these are leaders of the world and mind you, they are in hell when this happens {correct me if I'm wrong}. It beats me if there are so many of them in hell, what the heck they want to be leaders then?

It is not easy to be fair even in your family what more with the rakyats..there are millions of them. And people change..when they have nothing they can be nice to you. But when they have the money and power they CAN be something else. I don't like the way the politicians belittle each other.. I have known a few before they became politicians..they were nice people until they become politicians.

So who do I vote for? I still can't answer that.. I hope the person that I vote for will stay true to all the promises that he/she made. Will continue to care for the rakyats. In other words I can only vote in good faith because there is no guarantee that the 'right' person will stay right and the 'wrong' person is not the right person..You know what I mean..I am confused all over again...sigh

PTPTN

A lot has been said about the PTPTN. PTPTN is actually a body that offers students loans to those who want to pursue tertiary education locally. It is a great help for families like mine who have children studying in the universities. My daughter Nadia took a PTPTN loan that covers only her tuition fees. She's been paying it back for a number of years now.To me it is a simple principle of what you owe you must pay back. It doesn't have to be a student loan, any loan for that matter...you must pay back.

Otherwise forget the idea of owing anybody or any company if you don't want to pay back. The government has been really kind in providing a soft loan like the PTPTN form students. Actually, the fees for the local public universities are cheap around $2,000 dollars at the most. Sarah, my youngest daughter is paying around $1,100 for her fees a year. She does not take up a PTPTN loan since we can afford the fees. As for Nadia, since she opted for a private university, we had to apply for the loan.

The thing that does not make sense to me is why the politicians from certain groups wants to abolish the PTPTN that give a lifeline to poor students to continue their studies? Are they going to make good all the monies that have been loaned out? If they can't even pay single parents $100 as promised...where are they going to find funds to pay billions of ringgit outstanding in the PTPTN loans? Does it make sense to ask PETRONAS to cover the amount outstanding? Are they going to bleed PETRONAS to death?

Isn't it a simple process to just pay what you owe? According to Islam you cannot even smell the heaven if you don't want to pay back your debts..What kind of generations are we going to breed if we ask them not to be responsible for what they owe? It scares me to think what will happen when this student go out and work and misbehave and expect the company or the government to pay for them. For heaven sake..let our children be responsible for whatever they do...Life is never easy but you learn to live with it. PAY whatever money you owe. If you don't want to pay your PTPTN loan, there's an option....study very hard, get a first class degree and then your loan will be converted to a scholarship.

There must be a sense of pride if you can pay your loan. Teach our children with that sense of pride instead of asking them to fight for your political beliefs that only benefit you...and your political party.

Time to Worry Again

It's the time for me to worry again. No, No, it's not the income tax return time since I am a homemaker, neither is it the maid problem. I am not applying for an Indonesian maid eventhough I need one.

It is my son's SPM year. The exam that every school going children has to take before they go to college for tertiary education. A very important exams..so much so every parent seems to take it together with their children...if you know what I meant.

The first SPM was with Nadia. I practically stayed up with her when she studied for it. She passed it with not so flying colours but good enough to go for matriculation prograamme. She opted for a foundation course in a private university and now works in a bank.

The second was with Nabil. I didn't know how he went through it but our expectations were not so high due to Nadia's results. He passed with flying colours ..10 As. With it, he was offered a student convertible loan to study overseas and will be graduating soon in May.

The third was with Sarah. Eventhough Nabil has set a very high standard with SPM, we were really not so concerned with Sarah. We let her study at her own pace. She never stayed up late to study. To me she did really well..7 As and 3 Bs.

And now the time has come for Ridhwan to sit for the exams. Ridhwan made me worry a bit. Since he is in boarding school like Nabil, we expect him to do really well. You see, Ridhwan sometimes takes things easy. He likes to do last minute studying. But this is SPM..you can't do that like UPSR or PMR exams. The thing is Ridhwan likes to confide in us about his studies, so we know what subjects he likes and dislikes. The ones he dislikes ..he made less effort to study and the results show in the tests. He dislikes to memorise , so subjects like Biology and History are bad news to him.

We visited him today and he told us that he failed his biology test. Nabil did fail some of his tests before..but I do not know why I never worry about it. Maybe we expect too much from Ridhwan after Nabil's success..But I know Ridhwan is smart but he is a bit l--- at times. I hope he will start to study harder. At least..some hope glimmers today when he said he doesn't want to attend Mysha's birthday celebration this weekend since he doesn't want to miss his Chemistry Workshop. That's a good start right?

In three years time it will be Imran's turn to sit for the SPM..Ohhh..I'm too old to worry like this.....

My Gardening Blog

I will soon have a new blog on gardening. The blog may be new but I'm not as a gardener. I've tried gardening before, much to my dismay, I am not the one with green fingers. I have no success with my seed germinations.Of course I blamed the seed being an old stock. What else could be the reason when the soil mixture is okay, I keep the soil moist and look at the germinating pots almost everyday with hope.

So, next week, with the help of my good friend, Saaidah, I hope to bring back some life into my tiny front yard. And I hope to write in my blog my adventure as a born again gardener. I really have high hopes this time around.Wish me a lot of luck.

FIG SEEDS VS FIG PLANTS

I am trying to grow figs from seeds...it has been almost 3 weeks since i plant the seeds in a pot of soil mixture...nothing comes out of it. According to the instruction, it might take 15 to 90 days before the seed could germinate...90 days is such a long time and my husband and children are already making fun of me.

I love figs ...I've only eaten the dried ones. I've never eaten the fresh ones. So it is my hope that my fig seeds will germinate so I can feast on fresh figs.

Where in Kuala Lumpur can I buy a fig plant? So I do not stress out not seeing my seeds germinate. In the meantime, my cucumber seeds are already germinating and need to be transplanted in a bigger pot. It will take 3 months before I can harvest my first cucumber. At least I can focus on my cucumber plants instead of worrying about fig seeds...well at least for the next 90 days...